Laura Harley

There is a show on the sci-fi channel called Battlestar Galactica” (BSG) that I’ve become, well, obsessed with. The show is a remake of an older series, and you can get a good description of it at Wikipedia. But for our purposes, all you need to know is that the show is in part about humans being at war with a cybernetic race known as the “cylons”. I know, I know. If you’re generally not into sci-fi, it might sound lame to you, but trust me, this show is awesome.

So, one day after watching several episodes of the show, I was driving around in my car listening to Depeche Mode’s song “Enjoy the Silence”. I was singing along and thinking about BSG, and I found myself singing “enjoy the cylons” instead of “enjoy the silence”. I mentioned this to my friend and excellent music and video producer, Jarome Matthew (who is also a huge BSG fan), and we laughed and agreed I was getting a little too into the show. Then there was a pause and he was like, “We should totally make a video with you singing “enjoy the cylons”!” I thought about it for a moment, and, once I determined he was actually serious and not just making fun of me, was like, “Cool!” I mean its not every day a girl gets to cover one of her fave Depeche Mode songs.

So, here is the result. Jarome did all the audio production and video editing. If you’ve never seen the show, the video probably won’t make much sense to you. But I suggest you watch anyway because you can hear me singing super low and channeling my inner Dave Gahan. Note: the show is action/ adventure, so there are some violent scenes in the video. You can turn away and just listen if you don’t wanna see them :).

Here is a video where I talk about the story behind the video:

Today is the last day of the Fast and it also marks the Baha’i new year. Happy New Year! I love how this time coincides with the arrival of spring. Everything feels like its bursting into life after the long winter—literally and figuratively. This fasting period has been challenging—-actually the fasting part was the least challenging thing about it. My mom’s surgery and all that came with it was the toughest part. The usual challenges associated with fasting totally paled in comparison to the anxiety and struggles of that. But things are starting to look up now, thank goodness.

I’ve been meditating more the last few weeks and its been helping me to observe myself and my life in a new way. I’m having lots of ideas emerge about what is next for me and my music. It feels like a lot of things are stirring and shifting. I have a sense of anticipation. It feels like many thing have been holding me back for a long time and I am starting to break free.

Today I got to meet with Tim Sweeney (awesome music industry consultant) and the meeting was SO helpful. I learned a lot and am having lots of new ideas about how to share my music. But its more than just that—I’m seeing the beginning of a new focus for me, a new way to see myself, a new way to create my life.

Yep, a lot of things are growing and changing over here…I’m going to keep breathing in the spring air and letting my intuition lead me into this new phase…

I’d love to hear what spring is bringing out in you!

I’ve been sharing some of the new songs with a few friends. And it has been SO much fun! I feel sort of bad talking about the album a lot right now since it won’t be ready for purchase for probably a couple more months. But, I am just so excited about people’s reactions that I have to tell you about it! I shared it with my friends Ali, Kerri, and Elliot (Kerri’s 9-year-old son). They were really excited about the songs and had all kinds of lovely things to say about it. After listening, Elliot announced “Man, I need to go play Guitar Hero now!” I figure that’s a pretty good review from him :). It was so fun to share the results of this labor of love with close friends and to get such a great reaction from them.

Then, last night, I was in the car with my buds Marjan and Eddie and I played a snippet of each song for them. Oh my goodness. It was so fun, because they really loved the songs and they were actually clapping and cheering both during and at the end of each song! They said things about the music, my voice, and my songs that really went straight to my heart. It was such a moment of joy for me.

It feels strange not to share the songs with my family first, but with my mom still recovering in the hospital and my family still emotionally recovering, there hasn’t been a good time to do it yet. Especially since my family tends to cry when they hear new music from me :). I’ll be sharing it with them very soon.

The first listens to a new album are always special—and a little scary. Even though I love the results and can’t wait to share them, there’s always that part of you that thinks, “Will other people like this, too?” So, it has been so exciting and confirming and joyful to share it.

What an intense week! My mom ended up having emergency exploratory surgery this week. I am very happy and very grateful that it went very well. She still has a lot of healing to do, but it looks like she will be getting better now! After 2 years of a lot of suffering and stress for my family, it seems amazing that things may get better and even back to normal. I’ve been keeping my emotions in check all week because I’ve been with her at the hospital helping to calm her nerves and get her through it all. But now that it looks like she will finally have some relief, my emotions are coming to the surface. They come in waves and sometimes unexpectedly—relief, happiness, exhaustion, numbness, disorientation, sadness about all that she’s gone through, restlessness, worry, joy. What a roller coaster.

This week on my drives to and home from the hospital, I’ve been listening to my new album (due out this summer). At first I was listening in order to approve the final mixes and come up with the song order for the album. But as things got really tough this week, I stopped listening as the creator and started listening as, well, a listener. I found myself thinking, “Man, I really need to hear “Little By Little” right now” (a song about getting through tough times) or, “I just feel like hearing “Falling Down” right now” (a song about calling out for help and giving up in order to start again). It helped me through it all. And my greatest hope is that these songs will help other people get through tough things, too.

I can’t wait to share the songs with you! The final mixes are approved and now the songs are going through what’s called a “mastering” process. Soon they will be ready to share…

Here is a video from the last day of my recording. This week we’re working on the final mixes. As I listen to these songs, I feel like I’ve really found my voice. Every album is an expression of an artist’s voice and every album I’ve ever made has helped me to grow and develop both personally and artistically. But this album feels like it marks the culmination of a lot of things for me—a long search to find a sound that feels the most like “me” and features my songwriting AND a homecoming of sorts after some new and powerful challenges in my life. Its like I’ve finally found my sound and myself and am leaning into it with a new strength. It is an interesting process being a singer and a songwriter—sometimes you discover more about who you are by listening to yourself sing on your album.

Thanks for being here and being a part of the process.

My mom has been sick off and on for the past few years. She’s been in a lot of pain and has been in the hospital a LOT. The illness she is struggling with isn’t life threatening and I know in my heart she will get better. But the road to recovery is long and ardudous and uncertain. Its not the kind of thing there is a specific treatment for—they have to try things until they get it right—with lots of struggling in between.

Today as I sit next to my mom’s bed in the hospital, my heart is bursting with love and admiration for her. My mom is truly the sweetest, kindest, most generous, loving soul. I’d do anything to take her suffering away, but all I can do is pray and be here for her. Today I feel there are a million songs in my heart that I want to write and sing to her about her grace and dignity and strength going through this orderal and about how I know it will get better. She is so beautiful sleeping here—inside and out.

One of the songs on the new album is called “Little By Little” and its about getting through tough times. Last week when I was in the recording studio, my mom was in the hospital again and in between takes I would call her to see how she was doing. When I sang “Little By Little”, I kept tearing up, but I got through it. The song is almost finished and it is turning out to have such a sweetness to it—it kind of breaks my heart (in a good way). I hope soon my mom will be well enough to hear it and I hope she will feel comforted by it.

Yesterday I was playing the piano and suddenly had an unexpected breakthrough. For some time now I’ve been working towards being able to carry the rhythm more with my playing and to being able to feel more fluid and automatic with my playing. Yesterday, things came together and it started happening! It was almost like my hands weren’t my own—they just somehow knew what to do and I had all kinds of new ideas about how to play my songs better. I’ve been hoping for this, but I guess I thought it would take longer to get to this point. I feel really hopeful and happy about it. I still have a LOT of growing to do as a piano player, but this is a good milestone for me. I wonder if this fasting is somehow giving me extra creative energy!

And here is a little video tour of Archon studio where I’ve been recording the new album :).

As a Baha’i, I observe The Fast from March 2-20 of each year. In physical terms, that means I don’t eat or drink anything between sunrise and sunset on those days. In spiritual terms, it means something different to me each year. I’ve done this for many years now, but there is a mystery and a sacredness to this time that I know I will never fully understand. Each year a new mystery, new insights, and new challenges present themselves.

In my studies of the Baha’i Writings, I’ve found many purposes for fasting: to demonstrate love for God, to draw closer to God, to develop spiritual attributes, to renew one’s self spiritually, and to acquaint one’s self with the struggles that many people in the world must face on a daily basis. These Writings also say that there is a special spiritual potency in each moment of the fasting period. I definitely can feel that, especially in the many hours of prayer and meditation that come with this special time.

This morning when I rose before dawn, I ate a big breakfast and then sat in silence to read prayers and meditate. I posed a question to my spirit about what I should focus on or do during this special time this year. Immediately what came to me was that I should write lots of music. I am really excited to do this and see what happens!

Another special thing that is happening during this first part of the Fast, is that I’m receiving final mixes of the songs I recently recorded. I listen to them, suggest any final changes, and then they are done! Even though I didn’t plan it this way consciously, the timing of this feels somehow perfect and beautiful. Each new song is like a gift and a reminder of one of the ways I feel called to be of service in this world.

On a much less spiritual level, my stomach just growled and I have my eye on a double chocolate chip muffin that I plan to devour when the sun goes down! Eating after a day of fasting is so very satisfying. I need to go to the grocery store now—always a slightly dangerous thing to do when I am fasting. I often come home with many more things than I had on my list!  I’m also working on my taxes today—the jury is still out on how good a combo fasting and doing taxes is….we shall see.